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HOWTO: Read the Fucking Manual

The information in this article applies to:
  • General Lamers
  • The ability to Read
  • Basic Brain Function


This article demonstrates how to read the fucking manual, as popularised by the RTFM directive.


After asking a truly pathetic question, you are instructed to RTFM:-

*** Lamer ( has joined #visualbasic

[10:24] <Lamer> How do i [Your obvious/lame question]?
[10:25] <@oper> RTFM bitch

*** Lamer was kicked by @oper (fuckwit)
[10:27] <VBg0d> i made a irc client!!!!!!
*** assmaster83 ( invites you to join #animalsex
[10:27] <Guest50468> VBg0d, c00l, i made a webbrowser!!




Step-by-Step Procedures
  • Locate a Manual, either in printed form or on your MSDN CD's, if your a punk/bitch/h4x0r and don't have the MSDN collection on disk, view the online version at

  • Using either the Index or Search feature, locate a keyword relating to your question/problem

  • If your using a printed manual, flip to the page(s) as detailed in your search of the index, if your using the MSDN library, click the link(s) in the search results window.

  • Read the information. If you have problems understanding the information, read it again. Repeat until enlightenment is achieved.


For additional information, please see the following articles in the Microsoft Knowledge Base:

Q166392 HOWTO: Read
Q147875 HOWTO: Apply for employment with McDonalds
Q171146 HOWTO: Convert absolutely everything to XML
Q181290 HOWTO: Add a #, + or .Net to your old software to keep it cutting edge

Additional query words: l33t fool dumbass lamer monkey semen bigAl[work] Lurve god

Version : 1.6
Platform : Thing to stand on
Issue type : Type of Issue
Technology : Limited

Last Reviewed: February 23, 2000
2000 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved. Terms of Use.
New: The SDK for win64/Itanium

Article ID: Q90540

Last Reviewed:
February 23, 2000

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